Today I had to do one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do in my life. No, it wasn’t get in an elevator. No, I didn’t have to lift 50+ pounds of something. No, I didn’t have to go to a funeral or a wake. No, I didn’t even have to witness someone I love die. I’ve done all of those things, but by far today was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do. I had to admit that I might be leaving one company for another and that I’m not happy with where things are going.
Today was supposed to be a performance review of my own performance not that of the owner of my mall employer. I, however, decided to give my own performance review of my owner. I’m sure he wasn’t pleased by what I had to say. It was difficult and challenging to say the least. We talked over coffee, one of several things we have in common, and discussed things for almost an hour.
I am not one to sugarcoat things. I say them as I see them and I don’t tend to hold back. If I want to talk and there are things on my mind, I say them. It’s not easy and I’m usually the one who breaks down in tears, but they are because I am usually moved with emotion about what I’m talking about and with whom I’m talking.
I don’t like to talk to people who are older than me about things like this; I don’t like to even tell people I think they’re wrong about something. I don’t know how to read minds or actions well, so usually this doesn’t end up as well as I’d like. It makes everyone uncomfortable and I don’t like doing it.What’s done, though, is done. I’ve spoken my mind and let my opinions be known. Now we just have to see what develops in the next few days and weeks. I have a lot to think about and pray a lot more than I thought. I’ve said, things are great as they are and I’ll stay. Things may change, but only time can tell if that remains the case. I will know probably, at the earliest, Thursday afternoon; the latest I could know would be a couple of weeks from now. As is things have been said and done; now it’s time for action and reaction.
Love and prayers, as always!